I AM ALIVE

My system is so wrought with caffeine right now. HUHUHHHHUHUUHUHH

Literally, JUST got home. I went to Black Friday. I saw the destruction. I conquered the crowds of ravenous consumers. AND, I am still alive.
I went with my girl Kenzie, her 2 sisters, and my other girl Sophie. Several times along the way, our motives were questioned, at which point we chose to simply quit whining and go all out. As Kenzie put it, "Go big or go home." Well. We had already skipped out on sleeping, and we were already there. We weren't about to go home.

I'm not in my right state of mind at the moment, so here's my brief reflection on the mother of all shopping days...

Each store we went to, I'm glad we got there early. Entertaining things happen when you have to wait in line for a long time. Outside Old Navy, we thought of different things the letters "B.A." could stand for, other than the obvious. Having been told to use my filter around Dannica, Kenzie's younger sister, I suggested "Big Anteater" and "Butt Ache".
While waiting for Target to open, we somehow got on the topic of the neighborhood I grew up in, Wellington Heights (AKA the CR Ghetto). Naturally, I felt proud to have been raised in "The Hood", and for whatever reason felt like I needed to act like a gangsta. Next thing I know, who comes around the corner but none other than Kennon Meyer, who I haven't seen in forever; "Madeline Freaking Young!! I knew that was your voice!! I'd recognize it anywhere - I could hear you from all the way back there!!" *Reunion*

Haha. That girl. We go back a ways.

Anyway. So we get inside Target...Christ on a crutch, I have never seen such mayhem in a damned department store. We're talking arrows on the floor to show which way the checkout lines are supposed to snake around, aisles literally packed with people trying to make their way to different departments, entire sections of the store blocked off by caution tape, that kind of thing. Somehow I got stuck pushing the cart. Lord.
I had no idea I was such a skilled cart-pusher! Seriously! When we decided to move to a different part of the store, everyone else would go ahead, leaving me and the cart behind. Every time, I feel like I managed to find the group again with exceptional speed and grace. Good thing I'm naturally polite to strangers...let me tell you. It really helps when you're surrounded by crazed shoppers and slightly afraid for your life. "Sorry...excuse me...sorry...not trying to cut in line, I just need to get through here...sorry...excuse me...excuse me ma'am...sorry..."
Then I went to get coffee, which I'm never doing on Black Friday again. Stupid Starbuck's...why do you have to be so delicious?!? So many people in that line. I swear, it took just as long to get my triple grande mocha as it did to wait in the checkout line, of not longer. Idk. We won't get into that...I feel bad for anyone who worked there. Either at Target or Starbucks IN Target. (Shoutout to Leah, who will be working 8 hours in the fitting room at the Des Moines Target today - good work!! Wicka Word!)

*sigh*...'tis teh season. It was fun though :P